So i got there late, went to sleep late, woke up late, left late, got my number plate plate with minutes to spare, ended up in the wrong category and screwed up my nutrition to the point I actually puked on the bike (but didn’t stop). Was Iceman fun this year? Oh hell yes.
Took off after work and after three hours of white knuckle driving I finally make it to the lakeside condo my friends from the Custer Cyclrey team had rented, sat there chit chatting for a while, the usual banter about bikes and weather and making fun of Dan Tomkins by any means necessary, or available. I went to sleep on the hide-a-bed. And by sleep I mean tossing and turning and opening the door to the outside because it was about 1000 degrees in there. Finally I decided to just get it over with and buy some Tylenol pm. So I propped the door open, and the front door of the building, leaving us all exposed to all kinds of mischief, and took off to Walgreen's, whereupon, 5 mins, later I remembered the Motrin in my glove box and immediately turned around. I was relieved to find our bikes still there leaning up against the wall instead of in in the hands of some miscreant. Four Motrin later and I'm finally sleeping.
I awoke to this at 7 am:
Seriously, I love Michigan
Walked over to partake of the continental breakfast. Was only able to choke down 3 hard boiled eggs in my post-flu having state, then took off for the start in Kalkaska whereupon I realized how little time I really had. I’m speeding down M-72. I'm changing clothes while driving. An extremely hasty gas station stop netted two Luna bars which were consumed in extremely short order en route.
My race bike will be my trade mark Giant XtC 69er with Niner Rigid Carbon fork, Avid Elixir CR brakes, Schwalbe Rocket Ron front and Stan's Raven rear tires. A kind friend loaned me a Ritchey Comp carbon handlebar, Thomson Stem with 10 degrees negative rise, and Stan’s NoTubes ZTR355 wheels and 42x18 (not a typo) gearing which should give me just enough top end to stay ahead of the pack even on the 2 mile road section to open the race. This morning marks my first ride with this particular setup on this bike. What could possibly go wrong? Nothing. With the bike anyway.
I picked up my race packet in a HUGE HURRY. Zip tie it to my handlebar and I don't even have time to get back to my car so I leave the packet there on on someones air conditioner (If the owner of said A/C unit is reading this, sorry). Took off for a couple of brief warm up miles, chatted with friends I saw near the start only to be polite. Not because I don't like them but, really, I’m in a hurry people. A quick check of the back of my number plate reveals that yes, someone screwed up (probably me) so I'll be riding my singlespeed in the Open Men 28-29 class against all geared bikes.
Last years time of 2:17 puts me in wave 8, but this years goal time is 1:59, so I’ll have to beat everyone in my wave, and the four waves in front of them. In other words, pass other riders relentlessly. The game plan I’ve been obsessing over for months and months is to take the lead immediately at the start, and fire-bomb the entire field for the remaining 27 miles. This couldn’t have worked out any worse than it did.
Listening to the announcer at the start reveals that Iceman has become a part of USA Cycling. Which means probably something to a professional, jet-set, World Cup level Professional, and absolutely nothing to a lowly, crumb-snatching amateur such as myself, except that now the race is marked in kilometers instead of miles for the first time. Super. Now I have the problem of riding my ever-loving lungs and legs out, whilst engaging in math story problems at high (i hope) speed. See example below:
Arithmetic Section:
1) Bill is riding in a mountain bike race. If Bill is averaging 15.1 mph, and has 16km to go before he collapses and feels like he’s been run over by a horse, how many miles will he cover until they wheel him away on a stretcher with a black cloth over his body?
Took off after work and after three hours of white knuckle driving I finally make it to the lakeside condo my friends from the Custer Cyclrey team had rented, sat there chit chatting for a while, the usual banter about bikes and weather and making fun of Dan Tomkins by any means necessary, or available. I went to sleep on the hide-a-bed. And by sleep I mean tossing and turning and opening the door to the outside because it was about 1000 degrees in there. Finally I decided to just get it over with and buy some Tylenol pm. So I propped the door open, and the front door of the building, leaving us all exposed to all kinds of mischief, and took off to Walgreen's, whereupon, 5 mins, later I remembered the Motrin in my glove box and immediately turned around. I was relieved to find our bikes still there leaning up against the wall instead of in in the hands of some miscreant. Four Motrin later and I'm finally sleeping.
I awoke to this at 7 am:
Seriously, I love Michigan
Walked over to partake of the continental breakfast. Was only able to choke down 3 hard boiled eggs in my post-flu having state, then took off for the start in Kalkaska whereupon I realized how little time I really had. I’m speeding down M-72. I'm changing clothes while driving. An extremely hasty gas station stop netted two Luna bars which were consumed in extremely short order en route.
My race bike will be my trade mark Giant XtC 69er with Niner Rigid Carbon fork, Avid Elixir CR brakes, Schwalbe Rocket Ron front and Stan's Raven rear tires. A kind friend loaned me a Ritchey Comp carbon handlebar, Thomson Stem with 10 degrees negative rise, and Stan’s NoTubes ZTR355 wheels and 42x18 (not a typo) gearing which should give me just enough top end to stay ahead of the pack even on the 2 mile road section to open the race. This morning marks my first ride with this particular setup on this bike. What could possibly go wrong? Nothing. With the bike anyway.
I picked up my race packet in a HUGE HURRY. Zip tie it to my handlebar and I don't even have time to get back to my car so I leave the packet there on on someones air conditioner (If the owner of said A/C unit is reading this, sorry). Took off for a couple of brief warm up miles, chatted with friends I saw near the start only to be polite. Not because I don't like them but, really, I’m in a hurry people. A quick check of the back of my number plate reveals that yes, someone screwed up (probably me) so I'll be riding my singlespeed in the Open Men 28-29 class against all geared bikes.
Last years time of 2:17 puts me in wave 8, but this years goal time is 1:59, so I’ll have to beat everyone in my wave, and the four waves in front of them. In other words, pass other riders relentlessly. The game plan I’ve been obsessing over for months and months is to take the lead immediately at the start, and fire-bomb the entire field for the remaining 27 miles. This couldn’t have worked out any worse than it did.
Listening to the announcer at the start reveals that Iceman has become a part of USA Cycling. Which means probably something to a professional, jet-set, World Cup level Professional, and absolutely nothing to a lowly, crumb-snatching amateur such as myself, except that now the race is marked in kilometers instead of miles for the first time. Super. Now I have the problem of riding my ever-loving lungs and legs out, whilst engaging in math story problems at high (i hope) speed. See example below:
Arithmetic Section:
1) Bill is riding in a mountain bike race. If Bill is averaging 15.1 mph, and has 16km to go before he collapses and feels like he’s been run over by a horse, how many miles will he cover until they wheel him away on a stretcher with a black cloth over his body?
Part2 will be posted whenever i get around to finishing it.
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